I had to be cautious where I put my foot down, and was afraid to breath because of the disgusting urine smell among the stale trash. On Sunday the 20th May, I got off at Pershing Square Metro Station and walked down the 6th street to join my friend Theresa and her daughters to feed the homeless in a parking lot in Downtown Los Angeles. Theresa is a single mother of 4 young daughters. Through many years of struggle to provide for her family she educated herself and became a C.P.A. I offered to assist them without having the slightest idea where I was heading and was appalled by the horrible conditions of the homeless surviving by the streets of Los Angeles. I was warned to be careful when I walked down the street where the homeless population is rapidly increasing. I said “I will be alright” as I never had a reason to fret from homeless.
An Eye- opener! Seemed like a no man’s land! But there is life; burdened lives!
So close to my home, yet seemed like a different lost world in the middle of the City. While walking down the long stretch, I had no choice, but step on the street to avoid the tents and card- board boxes set up for shelter and the filth spread all over the side walk. It was hard to absorb that living breathing human beings live in such horrible circumstances in the middle of the extremely unsanitary polluted atmosphere. Men and women seated on wooden boxes watching people pass by blankly looking weary and disconnected. I just couldn’t make eye contact with them anymore , exhaled and held my breath as long as possible and rushed to join my friends. Seemed like I was passing a hell on earth. Is this for real? I uttered in sadness. OMG! Why have you abandoned these people.? For good ness sake this is the place called “THE CITY OF ANGELES
Once again I remembered the words written by Etienne de Grellet
” I shall pass this way once; any good that I can do or kindness I can show to any human beings; let me do it now, not defer or neglect it ; for I shall not pass this way again”
The need to make amends is imperative; extremely urgent, but what can I possibly do? How may I be of help? While walking down overwhelmingly disturbed, I heard a voice!Don’t let my feet quit on me” It was clear! Precise. 1 repeated the line all the way, by then I realized the walk was lot longer than expected. I joined my friends to serve a long line of men and women. Some stopped by to chat with me. Despite their circumstances, few were cheerful and spoke intelligently , I was pleasantly surprised when an African American gentleman in line ask me if I am from Sri Lanka which rarely happened since I came to US. Many don’t seem to know there is a beautiful island called Sri Lanka in the other side of the World; Oceans apart. Several disabled veterans served the country now on wheel chairs waiting in line with a feeling of inadequacy! Defeated! Dread written all over their faces. Once were heroes in uniforms ,now In rags; fallen and remain hopeless as they have no place to call their home, waiting in line moving lethargically for their turn for handouts!
There is something very wrong with this picture. I don’t get it. Regardless of who they are, no human being should have to live in such rough conditions anywhere in this world, written off feeling unworthy. This absolutely doesn’t make sense to me. America is the place of equal opportunity; Emigrants are feeding the homeless Americans born and raised here. WHAT’S THEIR STORY? I wonder.
Lately, I hear California might be called the Sanctuary City. I watched the 2017 May Day rally down Wilshire Blvd in amazement. Thousands protesting for the human rights of the illegal emigrants! Raising their voices while singing few lines of the famous song!
This land is your land! This land is my land! ; From California to the New York Island…… Freedom of speech displayed peacefully but loud and clear.
Many raise their voices to save animals, from inhumane cruelty out of deep concern, as they cannot speak for themselves. America go to war in the name of peace to save other countries who cannot fight for themselves, while many are hungry, thirsty and homeless in their own back yards without Hope of a better life. I wonder about the Justification! Seems like the new commandment “love thy neighbor “is a forgotten line. By the time I got home I was physically and mentally exhausted. I fell asleep one stretch until late next morning. I couldn’t get them out of my mind. My heart was heavy for the neglected people living in deep despair without Hope. The images wouldn’t go away. Would these places and people be abandoned forever? I attempted to get off the bed but my feet wouldn’t move. I was in excruciating pain. Then I remembered the words I heard. “Don’t let my feet quit on me! The still voice! An alarm! A wake up call! I knew it was time to keep that appointment with the podiatrist I kept putting off for over a year. I have neglected to care for my feet that carried me for so long; during good times and bad times!
It is of paramount importance we should endeavor to raise our voices for their human rights. When I bring up the subject, some are skeptical and eager to say that they are drug addicts, and that it’s” all their fault”and go on their merry way. Those struggling with drug addiction need help; certainly not conviction. Obviously, people are misled by rumors spread selfishly and carelessly. I want to ask them, have you walked in their shoes? Or ask what triggered them to become addicts? But I don’t. What’s the point? Who are we to judge discriminate and marginalize the fallen fellow human beings live in harsh reality.
Exactly one week later on the 27th May I met a homeless young man named Frank in Down town Los Angeles. That morning on my way to the gym I stopped by at Coffee Bean cafe to get myself a drink. While waiting I sent Theresa the following text message; ‘ Theresa, Having the opportunity to serve the homeless and got to talk with them made me feel like my WORK just begun.
When I was about to leave I noticed a young man sitting right next to me. We looked at each other. I said Hi, and he replied ‘ I was trapped by my parents” as if we had known each other. I understood his need to talk and said to myself, gym can wait and invited him to have breakfast with me. He thanked me for the invitation with a grateful smile and picked up his belongings in a small worn out bag which I noticed a handle was broken . I wished I had a backpack to offer him while he tucked the bag under his arm. On our way to IHOP restaurant he revealed to me, he is Irish British and, was born and raised In San Diego, California. I was flabagasted when he said his parents burned his palm when he was 11 years old and showed me his line- less palm. The scars still remain visible and permanent. How can anyone be so cruel?
The parents got divorced and split. He had no home to go back to,and spends a lot of time in the public library. He looked at me in regret and said, they won’t let me sleep there. He sleeps at a homeless shelter. He said he is a Comedian, and looking for work, but it’s not that easy. At the beginning he seemed so shy, but shortly opened up to me and spoke nonstop. He spoke about global affairs intelligently . It broke my heart to see this young man so alone in the city of Angeles. An attractive young man with a charming personality. After we had breakfast while walking with me he playfully threw the empty water bottle in a recycling can then danced a little with a smile when heard music on the way. I saw few moments of pure joy in his face. What a waste of a brilliant mind among many ignored and neglected young artists?
Suddenly, I remembered the Covenant House in Hollywood. About 22 years ago I began to support them as the place reminded me of the Welcome House in Sri Lanka. Couple of years ago I visited the Covenant House and met Amanda Sattler and Tom Bagwell. Tom walked with me and showed me around. I was very impressed of the work they do to save the youth from cruel streets/surroundings. I wondered how I could be of help. So I wrote a blog on my website hoping people may read and support the much needed cause. Please visit – www.teeraslifejourney.com I gave Frank the address and my card and told him to go see Tom at the Covenant House. I was so glad I visited Covenant house and made a connection shortly after I moved back to LA.
Exactly one month later on the 27th June , I heard a girl crying her heart out sitting on a stare- case at the Metro Subway Station. She raised her head and looked at me when I stopped and asked her; why she was crying? She didn’t answer. I then asked “Where are you going? Without a beat she said “Where ever God takes me.. I said “That’s me. I go with the flow. We certainly have something in common.” Then she smiled. The train arrived at the station and I said ” I have to go “and got in the train. Just as the doors were closing she jumped in and sat on the floor close to where I stood and kept moving around her few belongings. She was very restless. When I got off the next station she too jumped off and walked by me. I asked “what’s your name?” She said.” Serenity”. I said “Wow, that’s a beautiful name”; I wake up every morning saying the serenity prayer. I couldn’t just walk away from this vulnarable sad African American girl. While walking with me she humbly said that she was hungry. We bought some lunch and sat down. Then she started crying again. It was quite first then she lost control and was wailing and sobbed in exhaustion.. I sat by her patiently until she calmed down. I asked if she has siblings. Yes, she said 25. She was adopted by a Mexican family along with 25 Ophens.
Her boy-friend for 4 years died of a drug over- dose two months ago. She was into drugs but stopped after his death. She said it was meth. She is homeless. She revealed to me Paranoid Schizophrenia Psychosis disorder makes her react under pressure. My thoughts were, one of these days she might react aggressively and unknowingly making authorities very likely to put her in jail. She certainly need mental help not punishment. Jails are overcrowded with mentally ill young people as they were judged wrongly as criminals. I am not qualified to help them. I have had several confusing experiences with people suffering with Bipolar and Schizophrenic disorder and a number of people with all kinds of mental illnesses.. I understand emotional imbalance, because I was there, my emotions still get the best of me at times. Sometimes we all need help in that area; someone to understand regardless of who or where we are through our lives journey.
I didn’t have the knowledge or capacity to understand them, until I was surprised by people reacting aggressively when least expected to something I said or the way I looked at them unintentionally triggering them to react in anger towards me. I later realized how these conditions make them lose control under enormous pressure; cause stress. Now I am cautious. Those incidences made me speak less and listen more and vowed to stop talking unless it was of any value. How easy is this lesson once we grasp the new concept? Negative thinking and speech patterns make us loose control and this should be a “Universal Promise'” listening is an act of LOVE. Unconditional love what the Greeks describe as ‘agape” is distinct from other kind of love between people.
The reminder of her cry haunted me! similar to my cry many decades ago. I walked the lonely desert and understood how sad and lonely she felt. Our circumstances were different but the pain, the grief, sorrow cause depression is the same.It is hard to comprehend how debilitating a bout of depression unless you have gone through one yourself. It’s a mind-warping spiral where your brain does not have the physical capacity to function properly. I cannot stop wondering how she became an ophen.? Her parents must have treasured their baby to name her Serenity which perfectly suited her personality. Sweet girl; well mannered!. I Hope and Pray she would soon find the courage and strength to move forward .
All of a sudden I had a flash back. Many years ago Sister. Mary Rose from Covenant House sent me a card- The following lines touched me deeply which I later used for my fund raisers for Sri Lanka.
“On the street I saw a girl cold and shivering in a thin dress with little hope of a decent meal. I became very angry and said to God, Why did you permit this? Why don’t you do something about this? For a while God said nothing. That night he replied quite suddenly. ‘I certainly did do something about it. I made you”. The reminder of her card was a AH HA moment for me. I gave Serenity the directions to the Covenant House
At that point all I could do was feed her and show her a WAY
The possibilities to get things done are endless, if we give time of the day to understand those in need a helping hand with love and compassion. There is always something we can do if we care enough. I recall Mother Theresa’s famous words of compassion. ‘ We cannot do great things on earth! We can do little things with great Love”. That evening I put away Sister Mary Rose’s card with my important documents for safe keeping.
Then I saw Barbara on Sunday the 15th July. I hadn’t seen her for the last two to three months. We met about a year ago at the gym. I told her of my concerns about the homelessness and that I was writing an article to be published as the recent discoveries about the homelessness in LA disturbed me tremendously. She surprised me by revealing that she has been homeless for the last five years. An English lady who was born and raised here. She turned 79 on the 1st of August this year (2018). She said all I’ve gotten was a glimpse of the problem. She experience the hopelessness because she live among them and still hoping to live in a home again soon even though it seems farfetched after 5 years on the streets.
Barbara also revealed to me 90% of the homeless population is African American and added Take my word for it, I have seen it all , not just a thing or two!
The drastic change of whether patterns even in LA; frequent heat waves and colder winters are not on their side either. All the unimaginable odds of survival are against them. The magnitude of the problem sounded like an impossible task to be accomplish. She revealed she was afraid to tell me she was homeless in the belief that I might not want to talk with her anymore. I understand as it is not uncommon in the society. She is so grateful I decided to write about it and hugged me on her way out lovingly and gifted be a tiny stuffed dog with a tag written ‘LOVE’ . It was a AWE! moment for me. The hug and the gift spoke a thousand words of gratitude for a simple gesture.
My voice was heard when me and my children didn’t have a place to call our home. The humble plea I sent to the Universe was granted graciously. We have been saved and it’s our turn to save others. I write my heart out to reach out to ‘U’ universe for those in need of a helping HAND.
Let this be a NEWS WORTHY “EYE OPENER” for the news media to help make our world a better place all humanity.